I thought I was the only one,,,

Today as I was making my , every other Friday drop offs to the different grandparents. Maddison to her Nanna's. Jordan to her G-ma/dads, When Jordan said" Mom I've been thinking about how big Sarah is getting" I said "yes she's getting big" Jordan said " She got big fast, Not that little cute baby anymore" (me smiling, thinking about how sweet, her sister is missing having a baby in the house too) Yeah mom she has grown up, not a little baby anymore ,but............................. A big ole brat!!" Mom do you miss the sweet Sarah?"........... Well the thought was nice while it lasted. We are all trying to stay sane while Sarah goes through this horrible stage that is making me want to be put on the highest mg of nerve pill available..And her sisters locking themselves away in their rooms to get away from the mood swings that can be unleashed towards anyone at any given moment.
I wonder at what age the terrible two's really end?

The Best Years of My Life

Ok maybe not the best, but pretty darn close! The 80's were so fun, maybe it was the fact that I had no worries, no responsibilities. So bare with me as I take a long walk down memory lane..
Favorite movies....The Breakfast Club, 16 Candles, Pretty in Pink, Dirty Dancing and Steel Magnolias..

Favorite Music.....Joan Jett and the Black Hearts, The Outfield,Prince, AC/DC ,Montley Crue and Def Leppard.

Arcade games....Pac-man, Frogger and Centipede

T.V. Shows.....Cosby Show, Growing Pains, Silver Spoons, facts Of life, and Family Ties.

Hair and Make-up styles...Mullets,Side Ponytail, Teased bangs, crimped hair and lots of mouse, Blue Eyshadow and colored mascara

Clothes......Mini skirts and long t-shirts,Tight jeans tapered so much you could barley fit your foot through the leg hole. Keds and Jelly shoes.

Slang word of the 80's........Dweeb, fer-sure, F*#$-N-A, Gag me with a spoon, Gnarly, Have a Cow, Joystick, Lame, Like Totally, Party hardy, Scum Bag, Skank, Stud, To the max.

First car date at 16, NewYears Eve with My friend Jeannie, her boyfriend and Kevin. First time to drive a car was my good friend jeannies big green dinosaur. Loved that car, you could fit 8to 10 people in it easily not to mention all the partying we did in it! First Job at cafeteria at the local hospital.

First car was a 93 Firebird I got for Christmas. Had lots of fun in that car music full blast, Head banging to AC/DC or OZZY..

In the early to mid 80's the skating rink was the place to be and then
in the mid 80's we all hung out at the mall which was convently located right down the road from the Jr.High.. The Bowling Alley was located behind the Mall. My parents weren't big on us being there, so we would "go to the mall" Slip out the back doors and hang out until it was time for a parent to pick us up.. We were so dumb. The smell of smoke prob. Poured off of us...But who cared we were COOL!!! After we got into High school, cruising the mall parking lot and stopping off at the bowling alley every 30 minutes to see if any body "cool" was there.. Some of my first drinking experiences were from some older person at the BA trying to fit in with the young kids by making beer runs for gas money and a pack of cigs.....

pic1. Smoking in the girls room and never got caught. I quite that nasty habit 6 years ago. pic2. I was about 15 wow look at all that frosted blue eyeshadow. pic3 My senior picture. I wonder how long it took to get my hair that high.

pic1. Me on the right and my two best buds still to this day in the front. pic2. Me and my boyfriend,Jr prom.. We were broke up at the time can you tell we both would have rather been someplace else?. pic3 me and my boyfriend senior prom.
I wish I had a time machine to go back in time and spend a couple of days enjoying my carefree days I thought would never end because I knew everything back then!

ESP or just bad dreams?

When I start having bad dreams about my relationship with my dh I start worrying.. When I was 19 I married a man I thought I was going to spend the rest of my life with (don't we all when we are this age) S was too good to be true, He was so sweet and would do anything for me. We married after only 6 months of knowing each other. He went to work for with my uncle and I thought everything was wonderful. About a year and a half into the marriage he became so controlling. He would come to my work and stand around. Once I was home he would ask me if I was having an affair with all these different customers.. We would end up in huge fights and I would eventually quite work. It always ended up this way. We moved about 20 minutes out and this was just what he needed to keep me away from everyone. My car was broke down, not that we didn't have the money to fix it he chose not too. I had no phone and I was a wreck, add to that all the years we had been trying TTC( I thank god now I never did with him) I was so depressed. That's when the bad dreams started. In my dreams my ex was cheating on me. It was always in the back of my mind, but how ? He worked with my uncle. Wouldn't he tell me? No family is not always what you think they are. Sometimes they have just as many secrets as the next person..The dreams got worse and worse and came more often. After five years together I found out he had been cheating with a girl I had gone to school with. Her nickname in school was "Lay them all Lathem" It made me sick to think he had left me for a girl that had slept with over half the guys in school. What made me even sicker was to find out he had slept with many women during our marriage, Even went as far as to hook one up with his best friend and brought her to my house. Those dreams I had were true and I knew it! So last night when I had a dream that DH wanted a divorce it brought back so many fellings and in that dream he went he into details as to why. One of which had to do with me not being emotionally out there. The other me not being the affectionate type.(two things i have trouble with. I like to blame that on the ex.. why not) I told DH about it and as he was leaving kissed me and said " And no I don't want a divorce. I believe him for now.. But any more of those dreams I'm going to have to find a good divorce Lawyer.. LOL

My poor head...

I have been plagued with headaches for what seems like forever, some in which make me so sick, I can't even move for fear I will throw-up.. With my last two pg's my Dr. had me on pain pills to control the pain. For the past 9 months they have gotten worse. My Dr set up an apt. in Jan for lab work, including chest X-rays..What the heck does my chest have to do with my head?? Well, I called and cancelled that apt. I don't know why I do this.. Everytime I have an apt. I have full intentions on going and then the day before I call and cancel. Maybe I'm afraid of what they will find..Yeah I know Highly doubtful, but I am a pestamistic.. I always fear the worst. Over the counter pain relievers rarely help. They might ease up a bit, but come back full force halfway through the day(normally during one of Sarah's daily fits). I have decided it is time to take care of me for a change..I am now having more headaches in a weeks time than not..
If the headaches weren't bad enough, Sarah is going through a major fit throwing stage. No not the terrible two's, she went through that at age one. No this is the laying on your back, kicking, all the while screaming bloody murder only stopping once in a while to gag. These fits are bad enough, but yesterday she started this stomping one foot and yelling Not fair..All of these I can deal with( in the back of my head I just want to yell "SHUT UP!!") But everything says ignore the fits, don't give in, let them throw there fits. But now she has started hitting us..I always feared having a child that throws major fits in the store because they want something. I got lucky with the other two and just thought I had good non-fit throwing genes. Boy was I wrong. I think all those genes were saved up and given to Sarah. She has the temper from hell.......hmmm no wonder feel like bashing my head against a brick wall all the time!
How can something this sweet looking act so ugly?

All a girl needs is a tutu and some cowboy boots!

Calm before the storm

Yesterday Madd came home from school with two necklaces she got from the goody box at school for staying on green all week (good behavior) one said "Best" and the other said "Friends". Maddison said "Jordan, here you can have one because you are my best friend". Today I heard the girls talking about how much they love each other..awww. so sweet. I must say for being 4 years apart they are very close. They have their own rooms,but they sleep cuddled up to each other every night. Jordan has always had patience for her little sisters. As she gets older I am starting to see her need her own space and as she does distance herself a little I see a new relationship blossom. Madd is starting to treat Sarah as a sister instead of that pain in the butt, attention stealing little brat she has seen her as before.. I think it is because Madd has learned that she now has someone that looks up to her like she does to Jordan at the same time she knows she has a little goffer.. LOL... I know that this is just the calm, but this is one storm I can wait for. I just hope and pray they always love each other this much...

Liar, Liar, pants on fire!

Jordan came to me this morning ,after the tooth fairy left her money(not before..lol), and wanted to know if she was real. I said, well what do you think? She said" well I believe she is, but my teacher said that it was just fantasy and that the parents are the ones that leave the money..Errrr..Now I know kids will talk and eventually find out the truth, but for a teacher to flat out say she's not real really pisses me off.. Why not just say "you need to talk to your parents about it and then let them find out from their parents that they have been lied to all these years. The only thing was I couldn't tell her the truth because her little sister was right there. I told her we would talk about it later. So heres my question.. At what age do you tell your kids that you are a liar, liar pants on fire? If she tells her there is no Santa.. Me and that woman will be meeting on the playground after school!!!!!!

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New Man

There's a new man in my life. At first I wasn't so sure. I looked him over and checked him out many times. It was as if he was begging me to take him home. I thought of all the things he could do for me, The "magic" he could work for me. He has been wonderfull, never letting me down. He works his "magic" all over the house, but the bathroom is where he gives his best performance. I would love to keep him to myself, but I guess I should share.

I had my doubts, but am so glad I bought it.. We have a huge garden tub that is so hard to clean. I just wish I had this when I was pg with Sarah!!!
and the shower has never been cleaner.

Birthday Pics

Here are a few pictures from Sarah's B-day

What "ME" time?

Last night all I wanted was a nice bubble bath! On my way to the tub I hear DH ask Sarah if she wants to watch daddy play his game?(which is located in our room. UGH! All I could think about was how Sarah was going to be on the other side of that door saying "I want bath too, mommy" Or the fingers and one eye peering at me from under the door while crying mommy over and over...I said forget it and took a shower..Good thing I made it short, because when I came out of the bathroom I said "where's Sarah" DH said " in the living room watching cartoons" I walk in the living room and she is sitting there watching of all things King of the Hill. What a great show for her to watch. I have never watched it so I have no idea the names of the characters, but the father had been violated by a dolphin.. So if Sarah starts walking around acting like a nasty minded dolphin, I'll know where she got it from.. Oh , but that wasn't all . She had a tube of triple antibiotic oniment and had it all over herself. I just keep telling myself there are worse tubes of "stuff " she could have gotten into LOL...Give her time..

Empty bedroom

I have had a major problem getting Madd to clean her room. Most of the time the words "Go clean your room" brings on a sudden fatigue or major leg cramps. Most of the time, when I go to check on her progress I find her curled up on her bed sleeping.. I finally lost it the night before last.. I had asked her to go clean her room and she said "It's too messy" I said "Madd if you don't go in there and clean your room I am going to take a trash bag and throw everything in your floor away" You would think she would have run right in there with the fear of loosing her pony collection that she prayed so hard to god for, but no, this is what I got. A shrug of the shoulders and "OK". This made me so hot. I took 4 trash bags and told her was going to get rid of everything,I again got an "OK " So now there are 4 Large bags sitting in her bedroom floor. It sounds mean, but she just doesn't care.. I blame myself for this.. The kids have been given everything. Between the three of them, you could start a small toy store. Our house is bursting at the seems from all the toys. I am horrible about saving toys for the next one in line,I even have boxes in my closet full of toys that have been there for three years.. I need to go to Toy Horders Aynon! "Hi, my names Lana and I'm a toy whore". DH wants to have a yard sale..I could prob make a small fortune off all the toys, but I hate dealing with yard sales. I would rather give to the childrens shelter. or salvation army......... As to when Madd gets her toys back? I just don't know...Anybody with any ideas, throw them my way!!

Birthday Girl

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SARAH!!!

Two years ago at 7:33 am, our youngest princess was born. It seems like just yesterday we were standing over her bassinet wondering who she looked like most and admiring what a good baby she was....Never would have thought she was be that little antic driven little girl she turned out to be, always into trouble, but we still love her all the same. I think we'll keep her..

P.S. I can't forget her Birthday buddy!! Happy Birthday ALYSON!!

And a belated B-day to Carmen.. Hope you hade a great one

First day of school

Maddison first day of school was a couple of weeks ago and I am just now getting around to sharing the pics.

right before she left.. Can you tell she loves to pose for pics?

I hope they always stay this close!

Ok, yeah I'll admit it I took a pic of the bus bringing her home.. but thats not the worst part....................................

I took a picture of her getting off of it too, but in my defense, riding the bus was all she had been talking about. She just couldn't wait to be like big sis! I've got some really cute scrap ideas for this page.

Mouth open, nothing comes out

The questions have begun! Last night my 8 year old asked me what a period was. This is not the first time. A few month ago she asked and my answer I am embarrass to say was " I don't know" can you believe it? So I vowed that the next time she asked I would be ready for it (yeah right!)...So here's how it went

J:Mom what's a period?

M: It's this evil curse that causes you to bloat and cramp and bleed like a sluaterd cow!..... Ok not really... I said well Jordan what made you ask that?

J: Well I asked my G-Ma and she told me a little. She said that every month your body gets ready to make a baby and that when you don't need it for a baby it gets rid of it.. Then my daddy walked in and I got embarrassed ( so I guess it was left at that so I had to tell her where it goes to)


M: well around 13 you will get your period and you will bleed from your pee pee ( ok never been able to say the V word to my children. Matter of fact my 5 year old calls it her Peeps.. LOL)

J: Well my G-ma said I am to never discuss it with boys! ( Go Granny!!)

M: And you don't talk to other girls about it because maybe their moms haven't talked to them about it either and under no circumstance you are not to talk to your sisters about it! ( I would go nuts with all of them asking about Periods..
So I thought I better get a book on how to talk to my kids about all the things I don't want to ever have to!!

Starting over yet again.

I just don't like the layout of AOL Journals so I have

decided to start over here..
It's all about the kido's.